Her Alien Bodyguard: The Guards of Attala: Book One Page 8
I collapse on the bed next to her and cradle her in my arms. I want to bask in the glow of our joining, but the enormity of what we’ve just done immediately claims my attention. There will be consequences. And I don’t want to have to face them. She starts to speak, and her words pull me from my thoughts back to the present.
“I wanted this more than anything.” She looks directly into my eyes. “You know that. But we can’t put what we’re feeling for each other ahead of the mission. I knew when I volunteered that it could very well be a one-way trip. What I do is inherently dangerous. You can’t change that. And you shouldn’t want to. If you really love me, you’d support what I came here to accomplish.”
We’ve just made love for the first time and still the only thing on her mind is the mission. “I want to,” I say. “Gods help me I do, but I can’t face the prospect of losing you. Not after I’d given up all hope of love in my life.”
“I know it’s hard.” Tears pool in her eyes and she buries her face against my neck. “But we have to put duty first. You have a duty to your men and your people. I have a duty to my planet. What we’ve experienced together, it’s been amazing and it’s opened my eyes to things I didn’t think were possible. But we have to push that aside and do what we have to do.”
“Let’s push it aside tomorrow,” I say. I snake my hand between her thighs and cup her warmth. She throws a leg over my hip and pulls me closer. My hunger for her will not be sated. I’m determined to enjoy this pleasure we’ve found together for a few more hours.
ELEVEN
DIANA
“WHY DO YOU ENJOY CLIMBING?” he asks as I’m draped across his chest, basking in the afterglow. “In my limited experience, it is not terribly enjoyable.”
“Well, not compared to this.” I smile as I lightly trace the outline of his pecs with my fingertip. “But it has its own rewards.”
“Tell me,” he says. “I understand you climb now for a specific purpose. But I’m told that in your home world, it’s a leisure activity.”
“That’s true, I guess. But it’s a little different than doing crossword puzzles or oil paintings.” I prop myself up on my elbow so I can look at him. He looks confused. “Those are also leisure activities on our planet.”
“Is it a need to conquer the mountain?” He’s going to keep asking until he has an answer. I think back to the responses I’ve given in past interviews.
“It’s more of a desire to conquer something within yourself. You can never really ‘conquer’ nature. You can battle it and see if you come up wanting.”
He looks confused, so I switch to another explanation. “When I’m out there, I achieve a closeness with the planet. It’s a beautiful way to challenge yourself and bond with mother nature at the same time.”
He still looks unconvinced. So I decide to tell him the truth. “Actually, that’s all bullshit. I did it to please my father.”
Now I have his interest. He raises his eyebrows and nods his chin, motioning for me to continue.
“I’ve never told anyone this before.” I’m suddenly a little nervous, but mostly I’m relieved to tell him how I really feel. “I was an only child. Not by choice; they couldn’t physically have more children. They doted on me. Gave me everything I could ever want. But I always had this inkling scratching around in the back of my head that he would have preferred a boy.”
Mal looks at me with such intensity when I speak. He takes in every word and really listens. When I pause to collect my thoughts, he waits patiently for me to continue.
“I wanted, more than anything, to make my father happy. My mother was always generous with her love and attention. He was more stingy. I don’t think it was intentional, but he was a busy man. A famous researcher and a brilliant scientist.”
“Just like you grew to be,” he says.
“Yes. His interest in me grew exponentially once I started to show an interest in the same things he did. Science and travelling. But climbing was really the magic activity. He loved seeing the write-ups on me in the local paper. So I kept going. When I had my first National Geographic cover, he took me to dinner and toasted me in front of the entire restaurant. It was the acceptance and validation I had been craving. It was good to finally be enough.” I pause before awkwardly blurting out what I’m thinking. “I’ve never told anyone that before.”
I wait for him to argue. To say I must have misunderstood my father’s feelings. But he doesn’t argue with my experience. “Imagine how proud he’ll be when you save the planet,” he says.
A wave of sadness and regret washes over me. “He would be proud – they both would – but they passed away a few years ago. In a car accident.”
He pulls me close. “I’m sorry,” he whispers against my cheek. “I miss my family, too,” he admits, and I have the distinct feeling he’s reciprocating; telling me something he’s never shared with another.
I curl closer to him. “Tell me about them,” I say.
“My father is a farmer. A simple man with a giant bushy beard and the loudest laugh you’ve ever heard. My mother is the best cook in the city. She could take whatever food we had and stretch it into meals to feed three growing boys.” A sad smile spreads across his face as he reminisces.
“What are your brothers like?” I’m already imagining two smaller versions of him, and the thought amuses me.
“Very much like I am, in all the ways that matter. We were inseparable as children.”
“Do they all still live in the city?”
“They do.” A haunted look crosses his face. “Both my brothers found their mates while they were still young. I was the only one required to serve in the guard.”
I try to look on the bright side. “I suppose it’s lucky you’re the only member of the guard allowed in the city, so you can visit them.”
“I wish I could.” He toys with the edge of the blanket as he talks, and I sense his discomfort. “But it is not permitted. The minister is very strict about interactions with the citizens.”
“But they’re your family,” I argue. He holds up his hand to quiet me. “So you haven’t seen them in years?”
“No. But we write each other regularly.” He points to a bundle of letters that rests on his desk across the room. “That’s the latest batch.”
“Any good news from home?” I settle back against his chest.
“I’m an uncle. For the seventh time. A little girl named Iry.” He wraps me in his arms and inhales the scent of my hair. “And if she were mine, I’d love her as much as any silly boy.”
It breaks my heart, but it’s time to make my move. I disentangle myself from his arms and move across the room to the carafe of water. I pour some into a glass and take a sip. With my back to him, I slip in the tiny pill Savannah gave me earlier. Odorless and tasteless. He’ll never know what hit him. I love him, but I have to save my home.
TWELVE
DIANA
I SNEAK BACK to my room, taking considerable trouble to be undetected. I don’t need any of the other warriors to see me leaving their Commander’s room in the middle of the night. I don’t want to cause him any trouble.
I’ve grown surprisingly fond of my big alien bodyguard. At first I thought it was just the fated-mates pheromones messing with me. And don’t get me wrong, those fated-mates pheromones are really good. But now it’s gone beyond physical attraction and lust. Somehow, in completing our physical bond through the frantic coupling earlier in the evening, I’ve been able to open myself to all his other good qualities. He’s strong and determine and exacting, just like I am. But his tougher side is tempered with an inherent goodness. There’s a softer side to him that’s funny, kind, and understanding. He’s generous to a fault. The kind of man who helps anyone in need and would give his friends the shirt off his back. If he ever wore one.
And it’s not just him; I feel like I’m the best version of myself when I’m with him. He smoothes out my rough edges and makes me feel a lightness in my heart I haven’t fe
lt in a long time. I know it will never happen, but I think of things when I’m with him that I’ve never thought of before: being married, having kids, just building a life together.
I truly care for him. I think I even love him. And that’s why what I have to do next is going to be really hard.
I carefully open the door to my quarters and I’m greeted with the sight of my two crew mates in the middle of preparations. They understand, just as I do, that this is our one real shot at saving Earth. We aren’t about to squander it.
Mina looks up as I open the door. “Is he out?”
“He is,” I say. “I’m feeling a little guilty, I have to admit.” I walk with purpose to where my things are stored. I need to move quickly.
“Don’t,” Savannah says as she digs around in her medical bag. “It’s a standard sedative that’s used all over the galaxy. The Attalans use it often. He’ll sleep like a baby for most of the day with a head full of sweet dreams after spending the night with you.”
I could pretend I only spent the night with him as an element of our plan, but I just don’t see the point. Maybe I should feel embarrassed, but I’m not. What we have is too special to be ashamed of.
“What if he wakes up early?” A shiver goes through me at the thought of how angry and hurt he’ll be when he wakes up and discovers I’ve left.
“He should be out most of the day – I gave him a pretty strong dose - but we’ll cover for you if he wakes up,” Savannah explains. She pulls several auto injectors out of her bag and hands them to me. They’re filled with a neon blue liquid I’ve not seen before.
“A special gift from our government. Top secret to be reserved for crunch time emergencies only.”
“I’d say this qualifies.” I examine the small tubes in my hand. “What do they do?”
“They’ll give you a little extra punch when you need it.” “It’s a mix of time-release adrenaline, painkillers, Diamox, Dexamethasone, and Acetazolamide. It should fight altitude sickness and help you breathe.”
“Sweet. How often can I take it?”
“There’s nothing sweet about it, Di, it’s a very dangerous cocktail.” She shakes her finger at me with an unusually stern expression that reminds me of my mother. “You can take it once every two hours, but I’d try to space it out a little more if I were you. There’s some serious shit in there, and the government did very limited tests with it. Simply put, they care more about its effectiveness as a performance enhancer, not the safety of prolonged dosing.”
“Their main concern is getting me to the top for the Eclaydian, not getting me back home to Earth.” I give a casual shrug. “It’s not pretty to think about, but it makes perfect sense.” I examine one of the round metal tubes. “How do I administer it?”
“Just take off the cap and jab it in – the injector is long enough and strong enough to make it through your clothing. It’ll hurt a bit, but once the drugs kick in, you won’t care.”
“We couldn’t get our hands on any bottled oxygen,” Mina says, “but doc said some of the stuff in there should help you breathe.” She tosses a pair of gloves to me. “I took the linings out of our gloves and sewed them together inside yours. Two extra layers of insulation should help.”
“And I did the same with your socks and boot linings.” Savannah sets them at my feet. “I also got my hands on the fabric the warriors sometimes wear.” She sets out a crudely sewn set of long underwear. “I’m not much of a seamstress, with being used to stitching on people most of the time, but it should keep you warm.”
I take it from the table and start removing my outerwear. I’ll need this extra layer of protection if I’m going to make it to the top. Staying warm is going to be key.
Mira sets out my pack and I can tell she’s lightened it quite a bit. “I stripped you down to the essentials,” she says. “Food. Ropes. Hydration. Ice Axe. Nuts, hexes, ice screws, cams. I took out your navigational device, since it’s not working here anyway, sunscreen, sunglasses, tent, reflective blanket, repair kit.”
She’s done an excellent job prioritizing everything, but the implication is clear. If I’m not home tonight, I’m probably not coming home at all. But right now, I have a bigger problem on my mind. “This all looks awesome, but how am I going to get past the gate? Mal may be out, but there’s a lot of extra warriors milling around. They aren’t going to let me just saunter out of here alone.”
“Don’t worry,” Mina says. “We have a plan.”
Savannah turns to me and I can tell she’s excited at the prospect of a little intrigue. She and Mina are usually ordered back while Margo and I handle the more dangerous things.
“One of the warriors seems to have a bit of a crush on me.” She tries to be all matter of fact in her explanation, but her face flushes with pleasure from the attention. “His name is Radyr, and luckily for us, he’s the gate guard.”
Mina nods her head in agreement. “He loses his shit whenever he sees her. He’s got it bad.”
“So,” Savannah says, “I’ll go up there and turn the charm way up, and see if I can get him to help me retrieve some supplies from their storage area. It should give you just enough time to sneak out undetected.” She straightens her coat, runs her fingers through her hair, and exhales a deep breath.
“That’s very brave of you,” I say.
“I’ve always been ready to serve if called.” She gives me a wink. “Can’t let you and Margo have all the fun.”
I watch as she saunters across the yard to Radyr and I make my move. I stick close to the fortress wall and hustle for the gate just as she leads him away. It’s closed, but the control mechanism is easy enough to decipher and I raise it just enough to sneak under. I close it from the outside and rush through the snow, eager to reach the camouflage of the mountain slopes. My blood races and my ears perk up as I make my escape, listening for any sign I’ve been spotted. It never comes, and I reach the safety of the mountains unscathed.
I stare into the sky and watch the peak disappear in the clouds. Since we’ve arrived here, I’ve been a student of the mountain. I scan its many faces, looking for dangers to be avoided or characteristics that will make my ascent easier. I need a safe and fast route but everywhere I look I see danger. Ice fields, ice flows, fissures, giant chunks of unstable ice the size of small buildings. It would be so much easier climbing back home, with an established route to follow and ropes already in place. But there’s no rest for the weary.
Something happens while I stand there. Something switches on in my brain and I start processing things in a different way. It reminds me of the optical illusions from grade school, where two competing images duke it out in your brain. Is it a duck or a rabbit? Can you see both the old woman and the young woman in the same image? The mountain crystalizes in my mind and I suddenly see a perfect red line marking my route. It’s so simple and straightforward that I don’t understand why I couldn’t see it before. Mostly, I’m just glad I see it now.
I stride through the snow and make my way to the first stage of the climb, where I’ll have to scramble up to a nearly vertical wall. The slope is easy, my footing is solid, and I try to conserve my strength for the difficult work ahead. My mind keeps drifting back to last night and I force the memories of pleasure out of my head. I want Mal more than almost anything. But not more than I want to save my homeland. If things were different, and we’d met in another place or time? I try not to think of that.
I’ve reached the steep wall of rock I need to scale with as much speed as possible. I reach into my pocket and pull out the first syringe. I remove the cap, hurrying so I don’t have time to question the wisdom of my decision, and jab it against my upper thigh. As promised, it stings like a son of a bitch but then the drugs kick in and a feeling of warm comfort settles over me.
Then the adrenaline hits.
Everyone has heard the urban legend of a tiny mom lifting a car off a trapped child. I’m pretty sure I could do that right now, and I don’t want to waste a moment
of it. I reach up and slam my ice ax into the glacial covering on the rock. The crampons in my boots stab through the frozen slush with ease and I proceed to stab even higher with the ice axe in my left hand. Hand. Foot. Hand. Foot. I slip into the easy cadence of a satisfying climb. The cold tick every time I slice through the mountain, like the metronome that tapped out the rhythm during my elementary school music lessons. I pause to look down after an hour or two and I’m shocked at the progress I’ve made. I’m almost giddy with joy and I have the urge to laugh out loud, but I learned long ago never to tempt fate.
I was worried I’d be exhausted by the time I’d finally reach one of the more dangerous parts of the climb, but the overhang I need to cross presents itself while I’m still fresh and energetic. No muscle fatigue. No aches or pains. No trouble breathing. The weather is cooperating, too, and I’m eager to keep making progress while the wind is at bay.
I hold my breath as I swing onto the overhang. It takes every ounce of strength I have to hold on, and raw fear washes over me like a bucket of ice water. I should have taken another shot before I attempted the traverse, but that’s what getting cocky will do to you. My arms tremble and beads of sweat roll down my face as I slowly make my way across. I reach the ledge on the other side and collapse in a heap, giving my limbs a rest they desperately need.
I dig in my gloved hands into my pockets for another syringe. This is by far the fastest I’ve ever climbed, and I’m starting to feel the beginning stages of altitude sickness. My head aches, I’m starting to feel a tinge dizzy, and I’m feeling a little nauseated. It’s only going to get worse from here, so my best course of action is to get up and get what I need as fast as possible and then get the hell back down.
The chemicals race into my bloodstream and my symptoms recede. I feel fresh and alert and ready to take on the world again. I tighten the straps on my pack, scramble to my feet, and restart my assault against the cold, unforgiving mountain. Click, click click. Crampon, ice axe, crampon, ice axe. My progress up the second leg of the journey isn’t as lightning fast as my initial ascent this morning, but I’m still making good time. I was worried about getting stuck after dark up here with only my headlamp for light, but it’s only late afternoon and I see my final destination ahead: a prominent ledge in front of a cavity in the rock. I can’t tell how deep it is, but it’s some sort of a depression that will offer cover while I take a breather and fuel up with some food and water. And another one of those magical shots.